01 August, 2015

#SpecialFeature :: Introducing #Author C.G Salamander


Under "Special Feature" every month I feature a Special Author. 
During this month I put up 5 posts about the Author/Book, including Interview / Review / Excerpt / Guest Post / Author Bio / Fun Facts or whatever else we can come up with. Also on the first day of the month we will  launch the Giveaway contest along with the first post and will announce the winner on the last day of the month.
So be sure to check out my blog every 1st, 8th, 15th, 22nd and 29th of every month for something new :)

*** Special Feature - August 2015 ***

About the Author
The first rule of public speaking is to never show fear – or in other words, it’s to never let your audience know that you’re afraid of them. I’m not sure if this counts as public speaking, and even if it does, this is the internet and there are no rules here! So instead of telling you about my book or why I call myself C G Salamander, I’m going to tell you about my deepest darkest fear.

I am terrified of the water. So perhaps naming myself after a Chinese Giant Salamander (the largest amphibian in the world) seems somewhat misplaced, but trust me, my pen name had nothing to do with my name at the time. As I was saying, I’m terrified of the water, and I remain wary of it till date. So why exactly am I terrified? Let’s just say it had something to do with almost dying five times.

Palm’s Proudly Presents: The Four Deaths of C G Salamander

1)      What-a-Fall:

Sometime I like to look back and think of all the times I could have died in the most horrible ways. Here’s one such time.

When I was eight, I was knee deep in water, and chasing after a school of fish. The fish in Kutralam (Courtallam) weren’t like the ones back in Chennai – for one, they were much more colourful. So there I was chasing some fish, and occasionally slapping the water with the hope of catching them. But before I knew it, knee deep became waist deep, and then eventually shoulder deep. I remember my exact thoughts at the time – it was something along the lines of ‘was the water rising?’ The water of course wasn’t rising; I was in fact being swept away to the edge of a waterfall. In an alternate reality I died that day, and this is what my obituary would have had to say.

“C G Salamander died chasing a school of fish today, may he find peace chasing fishes in the afterlife.”

2.      Lake Me With You to the Land of the Dead

Two years later, I drowned in a lake a few kilometres away Kodaikanal. I wasn’t chasing anything this time around, and it was actually quite the opposite. The edges of the lake where cluttered with tadpoles that’d wiggle their hideously misshaped bodies under your toes and feet for as long as you stood there. There was no other option but to walk to the centre of the lake.

“C G Salamander aged 10 drowned in a shallow lake today. May he rest easy in his watery grave.”

3.      Life’s a Beach

The year I turned 12, I was dragged into the sea by a rather voracious tide. I had been digging holes by the shore to catch some clams (that’s how you catch clam; you dig a hole at the place where the sea meets the sand and wait for them to get caught). But before I knew it, I was trashing about in distress, waving my arms, and calling out for people to save me.

“C G Salamander aged 12 was dragged into the sea today. At least we know that he had a peaceful death, we saw him waving his hands at us.”

4.      Pool Me Out of Here

When I was fourteen it was decided that it was about time I took swimming lessons. I’m sure the lessons would have helped, had it not been for the coach who flung me into the deep end of the pool on my first day. I remained inside the swimming pool, looking at the light diffract when it touched the surface of the water. No one had taught me how to resurface.

“C G Salamander aged 14 died after he drowned in a public swimming pool. Death taught him what life couldn’t – to float on his stomach. May he rest in peace.”

And with that I must stop talking. 


I do realize that I haven’t provided you with much of an introduction at all. But I guess we still have time for that, besides I’ve always maintained that the best way to really get to know someone is to learn their greatest fears, and that’s precisely what I’ve done here. 
Do keep on reading, and while you’re here, please post your greatest fears in the comment section – I’d love to know what scares people these days (Taxes is not an acceptable response).

Contact the Author:

About the Book:
NIGEL THE LAST BRIT IN INDIA
There is chaos and pandemonium in the streets of Madras, and it is up to Nigel (an officer of the Imperial Police) to restore order to the city... only he hasn't quite learned about India's Independence. Yet.

GAYATRI AND THE CHURCH OF THE HOLY VEGETABLES
When the newest and most successful religion (Cabbagism) threatens to bring about the destruction of the world, it is up to a melancholic zombie and a collection of rowdy farm animals to save the earth.

ALIENS, DINOSAURS, PORCUPINES
A porcupine, after setting out on a journey away from home, falls in love with an armadillo. 


Giveaway
1 Lucky Indian Resident will win a Paperback Copy of Palm's Foster Home for Peculiar Stories



8 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Reminds me of something I read about this woman who fled north Korea to China, and now isn't allowed to return back to her family.

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    2. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    3. Reminds me of something I read about this woman who fled north Korea to China, and now isn't allowed to return back to her family.

      Delete
  2. Entering the giveaway and not winning it makes me very sad.

    ReplyDelete

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