03 November, 2020

Read an Excerpt from The Pilates Class by @StevieTurner6 #Humour


About the Book:

Roger is a down-to-earth builder type, Judy is the harassed single mother of four teenage boys, and Thelma is a librarian who usually looks as though she's been sitting on a wasps' nest for most of her life. Neville is on the lookout for a woman (any woman will do), and Julian just wants to be young again. Edie is the wrong side of 70, and Roz is a size zero fitness queen.

These characters, together with one very overweight Alice, all meet up for the first time at their local Pilates class. Petra, the class instructor, has no idea what she has let herself in for!

Book Links:
Goodreads * Amazon

Read an Excerpt from The Pilates Class


            Roger Harvey could taste blood.  He had bitten the inside of his mouth to stop himself from screaming.

            “How was the injection for you?”

            “Bloody awful. The pain’s worse now, doc.”

            Roger rubbed his aching shoulder and tried not to panic on finding that he could no longer raise his arm at all.

            “The pain will ease after a few days as the steroid works its way in.  You’ll need to keep the joint moving, or the injection will be of no use.  Start by moving the fingers of the affected arm upwards along a wall every day and see how far you can reach.  Make another appointment to see me if there’s no improvement after a couple of weeks.”

            “Thanks doc.”


            “Blimey Dad – you look a bit white!”  Lewis stood up as he saw his father gingerly walking out of the consultation room.

            “So would you if you’d just had a foot long needle shoved into your shoulder joint.”

            “Ewwww…..that sucks.”


            “I told Mum where I was taking you today, and Barry said he had the same thing a while back.  He joined something called a plates class at the leisure centre, and said it really helped.”

            “The wonderful Barry can go fuck himself and mind his own business.  Come on; get me out of here.”


            Lewis manoeuvred the van down the exit ramp of the hospital car park, and joined the rush hour traffic along the main road out of Norwich.

            “When shall I tell Bill that you’ll be back at work then?”

            “I’ll go back on Monday.  I’m going to the GP later on to get a certificate for the rest of the week.”

            “We’ll be starting on the footings for that new housing estate.”

            “Yeah.  I’ll be there.”


            “Sure you’ll be all right Dad?”  Lewis swung the van into Meadow Close and turned off the engine. “Want me to come up?”

            “No, you get off home. Thanks for the lift.  I’ll see you on Monday.”

            Roger turned the key in the lock of his one bedroom second floor flat, and gave a rueful laugh. Two years ago before the divorce it was a detached house with three bedrooms. Amanda had worked it all out to her advantage.

            He sank down on the bed and closed his eyes.  The pain was intense in his shoulder, making him irritable and bad tempered.  Thank God he could raise his arm up a bit more now though.  For a moment there he thought he was buggered.

            He must have dozed off.  Waking suddenly and glancing at his mobile phone, a reminder was showing for his GP appointment in half an hour.  Roger leapt off the bed, and ignored protesting stabs of pain from his newly injected shoulder joint.  There was just enough time for a quick cup of coffee; the doctors’ appointments usually ran late anyway.


            “I’ll sign you off until Monday.  Keep the joint moving and keep stretching the arm.  Do you belong to a gym?”  Having taken a quick look at the burgeoning beer belly on the patient, Dr Khan thought he already knew the answer to that question.


            Surprise. Surprise. “I’ll give you a 6 week gym prescription.” The doctor handed Roger a piece of paper. “Give this to the manager of your local leisure centre.  Your best bet is a Pilates class that will help stretch and tone your muscles.  You’ll be amazed at the results if you stick to it.”

            Roger sniffed as he took the piece of paper. If Dr Khan thought that he, Roger, was going to prance about in leggings and a stretchy leotard with a load of skinny women, then he could fuck right off.

            “Is it going to cost me anything?”

            “No.  It’s free for six weeks.  After that you can decide whether or not you want to carry on with it.”

            Well, if it’s free then it might be worth having a go?  Who knows? Perhaps one of those skinny women might even fancy him in his leotard...

About the Author:

Stevie’s debut novel ‘Mind Games’ was self-published in October 2013 and took her 30 years to write.  A London agency debated representation, and she now had the writing bug big time!  Stories started filling her head based on news items she had read and life experiences she had undergone, and she could not wait to get them down on paper.

Her second book ‘The Pilates Class’ was a light-hearted, humorous read, giving way to the more serious suspense/ thriller  ‘A House Without Windows’, which won a New Apple Book Award in 2014, a Readers’ Favorite Gold Award in 2015, and was considered for filming by DeCoder Media.   After writing ‘Lily’, a short historical fiction story, then came the suspense /thriller ‘For the Sake of a Child’, the screenplay of which won a silver award in the 2017 Depth of Field International Film Festival.  Her novella ‘Finding David’ was a quarter-finalist in the Screencraft Cinematic Short Story Competition 2019.

As of 2020, Stevie has now published 11 novels, 9 novellas, and 18 short stories.  She lives in the East of England with her husband.  She has two adult sons and five grandchildren.

Stevie on the Web:

No comments:

Post a Comment